Well, inspite of my hopes and dreams of staying home all summer with my boys, (this is where I let out a big pitiful sigh...but not of relief) I had to go back to work. All though the family is far from starving, I think I was more hurt and devistated about my last job, that I did not totally take everyone elses feelings into consideration...who am I to put that kinda pressure on Scotty? He is a good provider, and always brings home the "bacon" (which I secretly love his sausage), I think I was a bit selfish in letting him think he it was ONLY his place to do it. Although he was great over the last four months, it wasn't fair, and I know it. I am a big enough girl to admit my wrongs....whew and it's a long list so I won't bore you.
But one thing I didn't totally think through was when to go back to work, (do you see a pattern here? Apparently I am shallow too...Its ALL about ME!). I started work last Wednesday, worked 3-11 then on Thursday and Friday I worked 3-11 &11-7, the boys had a make up game on Thursday, and Hoss' last season game was on Friday, so I was working and my boys should of had their Mommom cheering for them. So this is where it gets worse....
Braxty-boy called me after his game, he got a "tropee" that he wanted to show me, so I could put it on the "firepace" or on the "TB" where his Bub-Bubs "tropees" are. So there it sets, a little silver tee-ball trophy, and oh my is he ever so proud! Which I was proud of myself, I did not cry at work, but gosh did I want to.
So there it sits on the TV, to remind me, I should of thought of them before I did myself....which I know....I was thinking about them or I wouldn't of went back to work in the first place, but maybe it will remind me to slow down and think things through a little bit better....that little silver guilt "tropee".
*I know I could totally get rid of it, but his heart would break, I would have to come up with a good reason why it disappeared, like maybe I dropped it or knocked it over while dusting....but they would never buy it...they all know I don't dust! LOL Honestly I would never do that....dust"
3 comments:
I guess guilt is just part of being a mom. I missed Brooke's award's ceremony while I was in Seattle with Lauren and she got two awards. She said she was the only kid without a parent there. That is totally untrue, but still I felt awful. I pushed to hurry up and get Lauren her testing (apparently for naught) and I missed something important to Brooke in the process.
Oh well, at least I only have to accidentally 'lose' certificates and not a tropee!
And why tho? Why do we always feel guilt? I mean ugh it wears me out! I swear it does lol or maybe i am just mental hahahaha
I am SO FAR BEHIND! You had to go back to work!!!!! WAHHHH! I'm crying with you. (Although, as behind as I am, you're probably over the initial crying by now, lol)
Well, bless your heart. I hear that kids will actually turn out to be normal adults if their parents miss an event or two. Look at me! Wait...bad example. :-)
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